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The 15 Most Exaggerated Job Titles of 2019

November 13, 2019

By Heather Nezich, courtesy of SBAM Approved Partner ASE 

Last week we wrote about the importance of having clear job titles to reduce gender bias.  On a similar note, recently released a list of the 15 most inflated titles of 2019, which, if anything, is worth the laugh:

1)    Underwater Ceramic Technician: $10 per hour. Your average dishwasher

2)    Therapeutic Integration Specialist: $11 per hour. A fancy term for a Teacher’s Aide

3)    Sandwich Artist: $12 per hour. A staff member at your nearby Subway restaurant

4)    Director of First Impressions: $13 per hour. Lavish jargon for a receptionist

5)    Loss Prevention Officer: $11 to $15 per hour. Mall security 

6)    Meat Distribution Engineer: $15 per hour. A title used to describe the kind folks who staff the deli counter at your local supermarket

7)    Trusts and Safety Wrangler: $15 per hour. A term for Community Moderator, one who polices online sites for malicious activity and content

8)    Waste Removal Engineer: $15 per hour. Your friendly neighborhood trash collector

9)    Reprographics Associate: $16 per hour. A fancy name for an individual who specializes in making copies and sending out faxes

10) Customer Happiness Hero: $17 per hour. An elaborated alternative for Customer Service Representative

11) Vision Clearance Engineer: $17.50 per hour. Another term for the daring, risk-taking window washer

12) Shaft Serviceman: $24 per hour. The industry jargon for an individual who works in a mine

13) Brand Warrior: $52,000 per year. Valiant though they are, this term is for a Marketing Associate and not one who partakes in combat

14) Actions and Repercussions Adviser: $60,000 per year. With Human Resources Officer sounding too authoritative, the corporate powers that be bestowed their HR minions with a more befitting moniker

15) Digital Prophet: $102,000 per year. Marketing Managers are all about getting the right message across, what better way than with this inflated title?

While all of these positions play an important role, they are definitely inflated. ASE partner, McLean & Company, offers some clear-cut advice:

  • Transform job titles/descriptions into living documents.

  • Design a job description template and process that encourages rather than inhibits regular updates.

  • Have job descriptions inform regularly occurring manager-employee conversations.

  • Create buy-in for your new template and process by providing effective support for managers and building on early successes.

Maintaining up-to-date and relevant job titles and descriptions should be a priority for HR and managers.  It not only helps employees know what is expected of them but can also protect the organization when issues occur that question one’s role or responsibility.  The three steps McLean & Company suggest for creating a systematic approach to updating and maintaining job titles and descriptions is:

1)      Establish a multi-purpose template

2)      Develop a process for creating and updating job descriptions

3)      Train stakeholder and implement the process

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